quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
