How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
