Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize