Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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