dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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