Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I smell stomach acid.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
