Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I am naked and annoyed.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
