Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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