So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
