Nicole vs. Life
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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