Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Randomize
