I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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