Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
