Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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