Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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