I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
