dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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