Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I just want to make out with him forever
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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