And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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