Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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