Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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