super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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