Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
