bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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