On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Non-Jews are for practice
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
