That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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