so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
