Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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