Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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