that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
