Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
