i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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