how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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