You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
