I'm jealous of your bromance
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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