You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
