hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
im about as happy as oj after his trial
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
