Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
