week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
