My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
