I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
