My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
That accounts for only three of the penises
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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