you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
please come you make the beer taste better
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
