These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
