I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I will be naked everywhere
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
