I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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