Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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