Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
