Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
