I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize