id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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