i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
